We are kinda hard on ourselves sometimes aren't we? In the spirit of "finding my happy place," I have discovered a few things that I really needed to start doing and a few I had to stop. Here I am going to highlight two steps, one from each category.
One of the first things I really noticed helping me was when I started a gratitude journal. I found this site A Holy Experience. She has put together an incredible prompt list so that if you do them every day you have over 1000 gratitudes listed in a year. If you go back on my blog some you can find where I listed some of mine, I admit that I have yet to be perfect at jotting down my gifts.
You simply print out each month and there is a prompt for each day. For example, today's prompt would be 3 gifts woven together. This one would be fairly easy for me, but I would need to do a little thinking. The first two gifts come to mind right off the bat: My youngest baby is celebrating her birthday today. She's 6. Tomorrow, my oldest baby celebrates his birthday. He's 26. Definitely, two gifts woven together, at least in my heart and on my thoughts. It took me some thinking to get the third, but really the two of them being the first and the last in the span of 20 years, really got me to thinking about the gift of a large family. Between the two, I have 4 other children. Each one has been such a blessing - a gift - that having the three listed together seems to fit the prompt and it has put a smile on my face thinking about it. See how that happened?
Busy >>> a little unsure of how the blog would go today >>> 3 gifts >>> happy place.
Finding that website and that process was one of the first things I did that made a HUGE impact on my days. Even if I didn't get it done EVERYDAY. I will say, even if I don't do the specific prompt and write them down, I do think about something I am thankful for before I got to sleep each night, it has become a habit.
The second part of the equation was to stop doing something. I really needed to stop bein so hard on myself. I was, and at times still am, not very nice to myself. I am my own worst critic. After focusing on "gifts" and "positives" for a while it became clear that the way I talked to myself was making it harder to make my list.
Let me just say that getting into the habit of listing positives was a whole lot easier than getting into the habit of talking nicer to myself. Still working on that one. It's a work in progress, I'm still learning. I tend to need my lessons put right in front of my face. In the last few weeks, I realized that even though I have gotten better about how I talk to myself, if someone else tells me I'm doing something wrong, or can't get things right I go along with them. The self-doubt comes flooding back, and I start to believe it, again.
It is so easy to put stuff like this down on paper, or the computer screen. It takes time. They say you can build a habit in 21 days. It usually takes me longer. The point is not how quickly you can do all this, but that you spot your weakness and improve in that area one day a time, one hour at a time if that is what it takes.
I saw this on facebook today and it really struck me as fitting for this post. I had to visit Eleanor Brownn's page and found many uplifting words there. Take a gander when you get a chance.
|Eleanor Brownn with 2Ns|
Would you give it a try? In the comments put down 3 gifts woven together and 3 things you like about yourself. Give it a try. It can be awkward at first, but you can do it!